Paranoid fill

Thanks for all your comments on my 50 pounds down post, I'm still there! Will not mention anything about my birthday goal!

I went for a fill yesterday, was talking to a nice lady who was there for an unfill, her band had suddenly tightened and she was in a lot of pain and discomfort, I let her go ahead of me but by the time I was in with the nurse I was paranoid about being overfull too. The company are only in London once a week and I have no idea where I would need to go get an unfill, A&E wouldn't do a thing. I'd intended to ask for either .1 or .25 of a cc, the nurse said that she's put in .5, we did that and I think that I felt a little gurgling so reduced it to .4, I think that it would have been fine, it was just going down slowly but I don't really know how it feels when it is too full and I was in full paranoid mode. I think that 0.4 will do just fine.

They were really pleased with my weight loss and said I was a star pupil! Am very happy.

Isobel had her educational psychologist appointment yesterday, we all went to take her, the lady was very nice and Isobel was very at ease with her so we went off and left them to it. I wasn't there when Paul collected her and we won't know too much until we get the full report but she didn't say that she had an ism and I'm very happy about that. She did say that Izzy feel a lot of internal pressure to perform at school and she also feels a lot of pressure within herself to mother George (I find this bit astounding) as she's the oldest. She said that she has a reading age of 10.5 (she's 6). The ed psych said that she was very interesting as where she is hugely advanced in some areas in others she is average and that would be extremely frustrating for her. I'm so happy that its over for now, am a little scared of the report but I'll get over it.

Hope that everyone has a good weekend, I'm going to the gym, taking Izzy for a haircut and then visiting one of her school friends so the girls can play and Raquel and I can chat, will be really nice, the boys are going to play with George's new football. Not sure what is happening beyond that.

50 down!

The scale said 14st 7lbs (203 lbs) today, I'm really happy with that, I saw it last week and then gained some back! That means I am down a total of 50 pounds, its my 11 month bandiversary on Friday, would love to loose another pound, I have a fill in the afternoon.

Went back to the gym today, my first visit in 11 days due to the kids being ill or off school, it felt really quite hard, I'm fighting off a cold and didn't sleep well last night so I'm sure that that didn't help.

Its my birthday soon and I'd so love to be under 200 lbs for it, as soon as I make statements like this I go off the rails so I'm not going to dwell on it too much, I have 2 weeks to loose 4 pounds, you'd think that that would be easy, wouldn't you?

Nothing else happening at all, got a new m&s skirt which I won on ebay, it looked to me like it wouldn't fit, its a UK 18, but it fits really well, I'm very happy with it.

Izzy is back tomorrow, I've missed her so much, poor thing has to have one of her front teeth pulled out in the afternoon, really hope that its painless.

Happy Wednesday all.

A shocking revelation

How is everyone today? My thoughts are with the people of New Zealand, the destruction after the earthquake is devastating, I really hope that many more people are found alive.

Nothing very exciting happening here, Paul has been really quite ill with flu, proper sweaty, headachey, achey flu. Today he is suddenly back to normal and doesn't seem to be ill at all, its been so miraculous that I'm wondering if he was faking it!

Izzy is away at her grandparents and is having a fantastic time, I really miss her, I really hope that she behaves once she's back, she behaves with my in laws but gets so indulged by having 2 adults hanging on her every word that she can be a pain when she returns.

We took George to see the Yogi bear film at the cinema today, he loved it and is insisting on being called Boo Boo, this is an improvement, earlier in the week he would only answer to Sebastian (after a character on Mr Blooms Nursery for any UK based parents of toddlers) Paul went to see the film with him and I went shopping, mainly for some alone time. I was looking at clothes, I saw a couple of things I liked in a shop with no dressing room, I didn't want to buy without trying as this shopping centre is a fair few miles from home. I look at items of clothing in the size that I know I currently am and can't imagine them actually fitting, still it saved me lots of money.

Have slipped in to weighing each day, bad I know but only once a day so far, today I weighed in at 14st 8lbs (204 lbs)

My shocking revelation is that I can live without eating chocolate everyday, I have pretty much always had chocolate every evening, probably quite often too much. The last few nights I have been eating grapes and yoghurt and this is satisfying my need for something sweet and I think that its really helping with my weight loss.

I am going for my fill on Friday, Isobel does have the educational psychologist appointment and I won't be there to pick her up, Paul will, he'll have to take George but its not the end of the world and he can relay anything said to me, the ed psych will provide a full report so I don't need to be there.

Hope that everyone is well

sorry,

I can't believe that its been a whole week, sorry.

Things have been crazy, George has been ill and off school, Isobel broke up from school on Wednesday and now Paul is ill. I have also discovered the Charlaine Harris Stookie Stackhouse books and every spare moment is spent with my head stuck in a book, it's seriously getting in the way of my internet time and lets not even think about the housework!

Food has been up and down, good one day, bad the next, I'm ashamed to admit that the scale said 14st 10 again today (206 lbs) will I ever get away from this number? It's my totm just now which could have effected this but I don't think it normally does, I normally get quite tight and I haven't so I know that I need a fill. I'm meant to have a fill on Friday but because Isobel's ed psych appointment got moved I don't think I can get there and I don't know when I am going to be able to go, I'm going to try and do my best to keep the appointment, will talk to Paul when he's better.

Poor Paul has flu, proper flu not man flu, I didn't quite believe it at first as 0ddly it started when I came home from being out all afternoon, but overnight he's been really ill, hot then cold, shivery and hallucinating, there have been other side effects that you really don't want me to share!

Isobel is going to stay with my in laws, Paul was taking her today (its a 3 hour drive) so I'm going to have to drive down there with both kids in tow and then come straight back as I can't leave Paul for very long. Can hardly wait!

Isobel has another abscess on her front tooth (it was damaged in a fall at nursery about 3 years ago and has suddenly started playing up) took her to the dentist yesterday and she needs to have it taken out next week, poor thing, she's great about doing to the dentist, really hope that this doesn't put her off.

Haven't even read any blogs this week, am going to have a quick catch up now, I've missed you all!

Weigh in day

This morning the scale said 14st 8lbs (204 lbs) so up a bit from Wednesday but I guess that its all natural fluctuations. I'm ok, won't weigh again until next Saturday, I promise.

Just about to go off to the gym, terrible night as George has picked up a vomiting bug, lovely! Was very ill last night, had to get up with him about 5 times around 11-midnight as he kept coughing, this morning he is full of beans! Its really amazing. He woke me crying at about 7am, I went in and he said that he wanted to go to the zoo!

Just hoping that everyone else doesn't catch it.

And, wondering why we have white/cream carpets upstairs?

Have a wonderful weekend lovelies.

Odd feelings

As you all know I've been having a bit of a nightmare with my daughter (this isn't about her thank goodness!) recently and have been quite stressed and anxious.

Yesterday I was driving somewhere and I felt quite scared and panicked about loosing more weight, I felt like I shouldn't. It sounds really odd, I think its because to some degree I hide behind my weight and felt panicked about being without it, very odd.

Eating wasn't great yesterday, some chips and some chocolate, quite a lot of both actually, but I'm ok now, I went to the gym this morning, have eaten really well and am kind of looking forward to my official weigh in tomorrow.

Operation mean Mummy is on going, not sure how much effect it is having so far although she was very nice yesterday afternoon as George had gone for a play date with a friend who is one of her favourite friends brother, she was pleased to see them both when they got back and seemed a little more tollerent than usual. Tonight she is missing 2 activities so she may well be more of a pain, lets just see.

The Ed Psych called yesterday to say that she has messed her holiday flights up which means the appointment has been delayed by a week. I have a little less faith in her now!

Update

Thanks for your comments on my post yesterday, its very kind of you to take the time.

We had the meeting with the head teacher today, was ok, told them that I thought it had got to the stage that we had to remove her. HT said she was very sad and she "loved Isobel to bits" we talked for a while about incidents and stratergies and it was all very positive. We've agreed to go ahead with the ed psych, HT says that she feels that there is nothing "wrong" with Isobel but there could be something that ed psych could uncover. She agreed with our decision to take away all of Isobel's activities until she earns them back and is going to have a chat with Isobel and tell her that she agree's with our decision that she shouldn't go on the school trip next week.

So, really we have this half term to see a difference and if there is no difference we will give a terms notice.

I don't believe that she is ADD or ADHD, concentration is not a problem for her, she just seems to think that she's in charge, she really needs a teacher who is very very strict.

I'm ok, still very stressed but have managed to eat today, still feel like I can feel my band.

I'm not much of a stress eater thankfully, at least not so far! My friend bought me chocolate and biscuits, I had a biscuit as I thought I should but I'm not bothered. My calories were quite low yesterday so I'm not bothered if I go over a little today.

Thanks again for all your comments, it means a lot.