This morning I went shopping with a friend, bought a new bag, a dress (size UK 18! Bit tight but nice) leggings (size UK 16!) a top (size UK 20 - boo!) and other bits, was really nice. Picked up George from new nursery, I asked if he'd been good and they said that was he ever anything but good? It's true he is a good sweet boy.
Got home, got a call from Isobel's school (problems at Izzy's school have been ongoing for the last year and a half - the whole time she's attended) its the second day of term! They are concerned about her, her behaviour has been awful today (to be fair she seems to have developed a bad cough this morning) but they are alarmed by what she has said, she was told off for something or other and burst in to tears and said that everyone hates her and she was going to kill herself. She followed this up by saying that she hates her brother (this is a regular thing apparently) and she is going to cut him and told a couple of her class mates that she was going to cut them too. WTF do I say to that? I went to the school early and spoke with her with the teacher present (izzy was really angry as me being there meant that she wasn't going to a school friends house for tea) I didn't get very far with her, I think that she was feeling rotten and was just hitting out but she is 6! just 6! She knows about death but how does she know about killing oneself? Have no idea where she has heard this, she is a very bright girl but still.
I feel dreadful, what a bloody awful mother I am. I had a horrible miserable weekend and maybe that has rubbed off on her, I'm just at a loss as to know what to do.
What I did think that I could do was spend a few hours with her every Saturday, just her and me, Paul can do the same with George and perhaps Paul does something with Izzy on a Sunday or we all go out together. I keep writing here how much the kids fight, I just don't know what to do.
Feels better to write it down, I just have no clue, my Mum things that I'm blowing it out of all proportion and shouldn't dwell on it!
No need to reply, probably best ignored!
I wouldn't ignore you! I'm sorry you had such a rotten day. It's probably something that she just heard and remembered....I'm sure she doesn't even realize what it really means.
ReplyDeleteMy brother & I used to fight very badly while we were growing up. I think some siblings just do that. We get along now but when we were younger it was common for us to say we hate each other and lock each other out of the house and lots of other awful things. I guess what I'm trying to say is, don't be too hard on yourself. *hugs*
I don't have any kids myself but my close friends have kids and they are always saying stuff that we have no idea were they got it from. Alot of the time it is more to do with what they are exposed to outside of your control then your parenting. Don't be to hard on yourself just keep an eye on her. hope your day gets better.
ReplyDeleteSome siblings are definitely just prone to fight more than others...especially if they're rather close in age. I don't think you're blowing it out of proprotion. I'd be worried too. I think spending some one on one time with her is a great idea! I hope things get better soon.
ReplyDeleteI would never ignore you, Friend... And, I don't think you're blowing it out of proportion... Very worrisome hoe a six year old might know about these things.. Maybe some Mother/daughter time would be a good thing..
ReplyDeleteAnd my boys are four years apart and they fought constantly.. As they got older (older than your children), i figured that as long as I didn't see blood or need to go to the emergency room, it was best to let them get through it..
(((huggggggsssss)))) to you....
Goodness my sister and I fought all the freaking time! It is hardest on you because you have to hear it!
ReplyDeleteI don't feel I can comment on what Izzy has been saying as I don't have children. My gut tells me she is just a bright girl that picks up on the right things to say to get her some attention. However those are pretty serious things she is saying. I would seek some advice..not that I think she would do any of those things but to be able to approach it correctly.
Second Alison, I would never ignore you. I am quiet in blog land at the moment because my internet service is spotty today due to the foot of snow we have! What better place then this to release some frustration!
I think Mommy Daughter time is in the books. Do some girly things!
once she's home and calm...i would certainly talk about how frightening her words are to you and to others. maybe she can explain her thoughts and feelings more clearly once she's in a relaxed place. but if this is a pattern, don't ignore it. can the school provide a psychologist? it's always worth asking if your fears are persistent. hopefully this was just a bad day gone awry. sending postive vibes!
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